Watching other people work? Funny.

Have you noticed how there are so many "reality" television shows these days?  Less scripted stuff and more stuff where some poor sap follows a bunch of morons around with a camera.

Bob and I watch some of these shows.  I like Top Chef (particularly Top Chef Masters), Project Runway, House Hunters International and, my new favorite, Duck Dynasty. 

 

 Duck Dynasty: a show about dudes with beards basically doing whatever they want, whenever they want.  It makes me jealous.  Also- they are the funniest men alive.

Bob likes the ones where buff dudes build things with wood.  Seems kinda gay, but he assures me that it is totally manly.

Screw that wood, my good man.  No homo.

Shows come and go, but we've realized that there is a trend emerging in today's lineup.

We call it:

Jerks With Jobs

"Today on The Cleaners: Helga and Trina dust lamps, shelves and cupboards.  Hilarity ensues!"

"Later on Nannies with Babies: Eduardo brings little Samosa on a trip to the bank.  Hilarity ensues!"

"This evening...on mystery television...join us for a very special engagement...as we join in progress...traffic court.  Who struck the garbage cans on Dreary Lane?  Find out later...on mystery television...when hilarity ensues!"

It seems like every jackass who has found some kind of employment- and it doesn't even have to be gainful- gets a television program.  I've got a job.  I figure I'll be the next star.  It's going to be HUGE!  So much hilarity!  So much...ensuing!

Mrs. Hartling's Class O' Hilarity

Starring: A bunch of teenage dirtbags, a few other teachers, and Mrs. Hartling herself!

Basically, some poor sap with a camera would have to follow me around at work.  In fact, they should follow me all the time.  After all, it isn't just jerks with jobs that get shows- there are a lot of other categories of "reality" television that seem to be getting more and more saturated... morons with mental problems, stupidheads with social issues, poopypants with products, oafs with offspring.

Imagine it!

You could watch me all day.  There would be a supporting cast of characters like my husband (Bob!  His name screams talent!), my friends (there's Trent the Racist!  Kim the Local Expert in Alcohol!  Mark the Hugger!), my family (God there are a lot of Chinese people in this show!  And one grumpy white guy!) and my dog (is that a dog???  OR FIREFOX?!?!?).

 

I'd go to work, roll my eyes at some kids making and eating phallic snacks, hope that no one got dumber, head home and scratch my butt a bit.  I'd pet my dog and watch some television.  I can't think of anything more compelling than watching someone watch television.  That's Emmy material, baby.  Or whatever award they give to television programs.  I'd win all up in there on those.

Moral of this story: I'm pretty sure the only thing holding me back from starring in my own program is my lack of beard, so I'm working on it.